"She's an old ugly hag." I heard one of the children said while I'm busy painting on this park near my home.
If only I can throw this pencil on this children's eye, I'll do. But I don't want to get in trouble with their parents whose always overreacting on anything. And who are they calling an old ugly hag? Do they even know that the term ugly is more suited on them? I don't really have the patience understanding children. They are annoying, little creatures who should be kept at home. I can't stand them.
"I should just throw this paint on them. That would be a sight to see." A guy behind me said while smiling so refreshingly.
"What are you saying?" Said I, even if I already know that he only tried to read what I'm thinking.
"Well, you always have that angry look whenever you see children. You should relax and appreciate how innocent they are."
"Innocent? Those tiny, devilish creatures, who always seem like on a rampage are innocent? Are you blind?" I answered with amazement, and that made him burst into laughter.
"It makes me wonder how you'll treat our child in the future. Like, are you going to scold them every day?" He said while still smiling.
He made it so easy to say it. Isn't he embarrassed? I felt like all of the heat on this park get through me. My heart feels like bursting, and I don't even know what to tell him.
"Hey. I'm just kidding. I know you will be a good mom." He added while poking my cheeks, trying to get my attention which is now staring at the opposite direction of him, wanting to hide my red face.
"Yah yah. Stop it, will you? I don't want this kind of conversation." I said to him while still looking nowhere.
He holds both of my arms and turns me on his direction. His eyes met mine. His laughing face earlier was changed into a serious one.
"I love you, okay? I know that you experienced bad things, terrible things growing up. I know that you are having a hard time expressing what you feel. I just want you to know that I'm always here, understand? When you feel like crying, or wanting someone to open up for, I want it to be me. I wanted to be always the first one you'll think of when you needed someone. And I'm dead serious about that. Nothing can change that. I'm already seeing you as my wife, as the mother of my kids, as someone who will be beside me in my lifetime. I hope I'll also be the same for you." He said, while holding my hand next to his heart. I can feel his heart beat so fast, and so is mine.
I wanted to tell him that I feel the same way.
I wanted to answer those feelings. I also wanted him to always stay beside me.
I should have told him that, when I still have the time.
Never did I imagine that those are just memories. Never did I expect that I will be sitting on this same spot, 5 years later, while he is now happy with someone else.
You said that nothing would change. You said that you would always be here for me. You promise me. And promises are meant to break hearts.
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